Are YOU obsessed about winning money! Did you know that 10.6 million Australians aged 18+ (55.4%) gambled in the 12 months to June 2018, including 8.6 million (44.8%) who bought a lottery or scratchie ticket?. Our Resident Counsellor, ZOE SLATER provides some advice on how we could all better manage our obsession with winning.
Reading between the lines it’s saying 1:2, one out of two adults are hoping for the Big Win.
The REALITY of you winning either Powerball or Mega Millions are roughly 175 million to one. Despite those odds, one third of people believe that winning the lottery is the only way they will ever retire.
And the worst part? Most people who win money end up back at the same financial situation they were in prior to their win, or even worse off!
So…are YOU obsessed about winning money?
Let’s explore the topic of a ‘Big Win’ through my client who for privacy reasons I have called Bob.
Bob tells me that he has been unwell physically and emotionally, has financial challenges, he is not coping and is desperate to get better. He thought his recent ‘Big Win’ would have made his life better, but it made his life worse.
So before meeting me let me tell you a bit of Bob’s ‘Big Win’ story. His parents had a significant WIN from Lotto and gave him a substantial amount of money.
Bob’s desperation to fix things and get better disappeared with the ‘Big Win’. All Bob’s worries temporarily vanished. What do you think Bob did with the money?
He upgraded his car, had expensive dinners, did more gambling, paid of some debts – but then created more debts, buying unnecessary incidentals and he now is back to where he begun. Feeling worse and even broker.
He regrets not slowing down. Not letting the money sit in his account for a few weeks so he could really think about how best to invest the money or even get professional advice.
Bob is now painfully aware the need to change his emotional and mental mindset about him-self and his money mindset.
That Big Win made him an even bigger spender, more materialist, his behaviour affected friendships and sheepishly he had hoped that his parents would give him more money. It was a hard lesson for Bob!
Money doesn’t maketh the wo/man, it’s…the wo/man who maketh the money!
I don’t want to make your obsession about winning right or wrong, but I do want to make you think.
Will winning money help or hinder you? Is it building false hope or like Bob are you not willing to change your bad habits?.
Let’s look at your Big Win mindset with the help of Bob’s story.
Here are six challenges to help you explore your obsessions about winning money.
(Try not to jump forward, get a pen and answer each question thoroughly before going to the next question).
Bob realised that winning money didn’t improve the important things. For example, how to think and behave like a financially successful person. It didn’t teach him the mental and emotional disciplines to turn money stress into money success. Can you learn from Bob’s mistake? If this was you, what emotional and mental disciplines would you need to implement now….what habits do you need to change so that if you were to win money, you wouldn’t lose it?.
If you don’t win money. How will that affect your life. Remember the odds are 175 million to one, which means you’re not likely to win. In reflection Bob recognises that in not winning money kept him constantly winging about not having enough money. Waiting for that lucky break, a cycle of wishing, hoping and gambling. Taking a punt to change his luck. And now realises that he is the only one who can change his luck. And that it’s preferred behaviours done daily that become successful money rituals that he is proud of.
Bob recognised that he had an issue. He came to realise that he was letting his situation slowly get worse and incredibly desperate, agitated and moody. Ironically waiting for the Big Win allowed him to feel lucky, or good about himself even though it was only for that moment, a sense of pride, a sense of being victorious and the very few times in his life that he felt confident. He was addicted to that high, chasing the same WINNING MONEY, spending hard earned money or borrowed on he chance of winning money. Bob decided to stop buying Lotto tickets and deleted his punting apps. It was a struggle, but he did it.
Bob realised he had to tell his friends about his ‘gambling’. This way they wouldn’t encourage him to bet or buy tickets. He asked for praise and recognition for not chasing the ‘Big Win’. How many days a week do you think Bob gambled. How many days a week do you place a bet to win money?. Now please times that by 52 weeks a year.
Bob now has a bank account called ‘Winning Money’. So instead of gambling the money, he puts it in a locked Christmas savings account that he can not touch. What will you do?
Bob took control of his finances and started saving. He worked out that at the end of 52 weeks the money in his account will actually contribute to solving some of his financial problems and will have created new money success rituals and behaviours discussed in points 1 and 2. Every day he feels so much happier, excited and proud of himself. Watching his situation change was like a transformation and became the ‘Man Who Maketh The Money’. Yes!, Bob turned his stress to success.
I hope sharing Bob’s story and his obsession about winning money through his six lessons has opened your mind and heart to help a loved one or yourself.
The key points are;
- Winning money doesn’t improve your money mindset.
- You need to establish successful money rituals.
- Winning money is a false high parading as confidence.
- Ask friends to praise you when you don’t gamble.
- Save the money you win.
- Take self-pride in turning money stress to money success.
Some extra things to think about
Bob not only transformed his life, but also his family who counted on him dearly. He won back their respect and trust. Two things he thought were irreparable.
MAKE A PACT TO ACT – practice the art of having money success and I assure you, your life will start heading in the right direction.
About Zoe Slater
Zoe is the director of Zoe Slater Counselling and CEO Freedom Choice Academy. She studied at The Australian College of Applied Psychology, Sydney Campus and completed her Diploma of Counselling and Communication at the Brisbane Campus. Zoe is an Associate Member with the Queensland Counsellors Association Inc and a member with Australian Counsellors Association.